Today, I found myself playing hymns for the elderly and attempting to sing along...
Then, I realized, these songs make me quite uncomfortable. Especially, the one hymn dealing with the end of the world and the afterlife.
Why, ever since I've been a kid, all of this talk of everlasting life, heaven, sin, and all that related-jazz has made me quite uncomfortable. Some say nature points to God and God came to find us by revealing himself in Jesus and did so best of all on the cross. The texts in which all of this is located is rather full of "tensions" about the details of all this business and Jesus is barely mentioned outside of the New Testament in the writings of other historians.
So, what is the truth? What happens after we die? I'm just trying to live life the best I can and to how my conscience, inner voice, divine sign indicates...
I'm rather frustrated at times...
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2 comments:
A few years back, I was uncomfortable talking about death, but only from a scholarly perspective.
For an early age, I had a really unique, innate reaction to death of loved ones. I found acceptance a lot sooner than others - and I guess it was the Buddhist in me. I could let go. I saw the function in it as a necessity of life.
But when it came to my own life, that's another story. Unlike a Buddhist, I couldn't let my ego go.
I was ok with dying and the thought of my own body decaying to nothingness. But I wasn't ok with my identity being lost in the shadows of time. I had (and still have) the urge to become immortalized, through my work, my accomplishments, my offspring, etc.
I've gotten over it a little, maybe due to maturity, maybe due to hearing so much Unitarian, life affirming stuff.
Speaking of life affirming, my blog is alive and healthy again! I was off the wagon for so long, I didn't want to go around gathering people up until it got some strength back into it. It's different now, and about stuff other than religion (though I think it's possible to subscribe to just the religion feed with my labels).
Click my profile to see it :)
Modern Girl,
I'm super happy that your blog is alive again because I was really wanting to hear your input about the world around but I could not. My invitation to your blog had expired and I could not find your new one, sadly.
Thanks for your comment. I just really struggle with what happens after death because of what has been burnt into head and everything I was struggling with came back with a vengenance after I decided to sober up for the last two weeks of this semester.
I think it's more about the struggle. That's what the basis of Judaism, Islam, and Christianity are about: the struggle to live life and find the truth.
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